Its kinda a confidence crusher when your husband cheats on you with a woman three times your size and who is not attractive at all. But I would like to say that even though that is really hurtful I have been learning a lot about myself and my confidence because of it.
I would like to say that I am not skinny but I am by no means fat. I am 5’7” and I weigh 165 lbs. The past two years I have been struggling to lose weight and have dealt with self confidence issues. But recently that has all changed. You would think that I would be absolutely angry with myself and my body but its kinda the opposite. Even though it’s very hurtful to think of how my husband was more attracted to M instead of me, I look at that as a reflection on him and not me. If anything at all, it gives me awesome motivation when I am working out. I just think of that fat whore and I am able to pump out another set of sit-ups and leg presses haha!
Last week I took my measurements to track my workout progress….I have a 40” bust and a 40” hip. When I read those measurements I literally said out loud, “DAMN! I like my size!”. I know that I am not the skinniest but when I look in my mirror, I don’t see my fat, I think “wow…look at those curves!”. I see myself in pictures and I can see that I am a little over weight but it doesn’t really bother me because I am working out to get fit and get right. Working out gives me a outlet to let out my angers and frustrations. It gives me confidence and it makes me happy. I know that I will start to see progress soon and that gives me hope. I know that I have abs that are just dying to be shown off in a swimsuit and I know that I will get there.
J has taken a lot from me and I have lots of issues to deal with but he did leave me with one thing; motivation which in turn has helped me get my confidence back.
4 comments:
Thanks Suzie!!!! I plan to kick a lot of asses, including mine at the gym :) haha
I just got caught up on the last few posts. You stay strong and fabulous, you hear!! MUCH LOVE!
@ Sleepyjane - Yes Ma'am! haha thanks :D
You ROCK. Also, I am sending you an invite to http://inittogymit.com RIGHT NOW.
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